i woke up
by merenserey
Summary: nightmares and things ginny is wanting to understand


"so we need to speak of ginerva " the mind healer said her name was mrs.shots

"yes what can we do to help her get better " mom said

"well ginny has a lot of problems mental probloms she is not mental but she has mental disorters " Dr.shots while tacking out her jurnal and opening up to her paige about ginny and her disorters

they all noded

"ginny's first disorter is anxiety after thinking a lot of negitive thoughts our body starts to feel a lot of symptoms .sweating ,nervousness, avoiding eye contact ,tight muscles and feeling like a statue these symptoms then result in bad feelings she will often feels like these feeling are intolerable to handle "she said and fliped a page

they all noded "yes we kind of expexted that but what else" said bill as they all laced their hands together

"ginny has hit borderline disorter were she will test you to see if you will abandon her she will ask a lot of questions that she already knows because she feels falure .she gets tired of life and her head she will apolajize a lot .the change of a subject can become immediatley unplesent and cause a reaction -anger ,sadness,fear,ect."she said they looked at each other and noded

"she will stay a bit quiet it's not like she have nothing to say ,she would rather let the emotion storm inside her and say things to hurt you but immediatley be sorry and have a panick attack "she said they all pailed

"she has what how long how many times "charlie said

"she had 12 a day in the first week and only 6 a day the second week and then 4 a days the 3rd week now she bearly has any " she said they all noded

"so what else "said ron

"she has derelization its when she will loose touch with her suroundings .could feel foggy or sort of dream like as if she was in a dream and could not wake up "she said and they all noded

"she has depersonalisation it is similar to derelization it's called depersonalisation it is when she will feel lost touvh with herself .this could feel like she will watch herself do something or act in a certin way and they don't have control over it at all "she said they all noded

"now second last but definatly not least ginny has hit hard deprestion "she said mom burst into tears and dad held her they all pailed

"now depretion is more than just sadness it can feel empty almost like nothing at all .depretion is unecplainable and it makes her scilent it isolates her she will probrobly go into self harm now she will most defanetly tell you she is fine but remeber she is not "she said

"ya but how can we help her "fred said

"ya are we just suposed to watch her ir help her "said charlie

"dont prove her right she is going to test you yes"she said

"ok so last she will have little moments with prosopagnosia its were she will have momets after a panic attack she will have this for about 1 hour were she does not reconize faces its like taking a phohto but it never saves but she has stoped that that no longer happens "she said

"wait panick attacks when does she have them " ron said

"yes when does she have them " bill said

"well she can have it anytime she can have one during brakfast ,lunch or dinner if she has negitive thoughts she will just have one she could be in the shower or sleeping and. nightmare she wakes up its dark then she will have a panick. "she said

"what just in the middle of nowere she could just have one "said ron

"yes " D.r.shots said

they all pailed they knew that she would not have normal life anymore but they can help

"ys now ginerva she dont tease her she will get angry but she can not sleep alone she has to sleep with the closest brother "she said

"she'll sleep with me im the youngest closest to her "ron said

"not by age she will sleep with me i have read books about this i know what to do if she has any problems "percy said

"she will sleep with us what is better than 1 person 2 people "said george

"no me because i know more about her and im her favriote "said charlie they all argued until bill shut them up

"she will sleep with me i know her best i am closest to her and she has slept in my bed before she has only slept in charlies bed once but i was the one she would go to also im the oldest "bill said

"alright then travel will be best for her she will have to get out of her confert zone "she said and she got up

"i would like letters of how she is doing and yes i would also speak to her in letters myself " she said

"i will be going i will right you letters with problems she has that you have difuculty " she said they all noded and she left

"alright ron go bring ginny down she has her things packed we are leaving tonight remember so go bring her down for lunch yes "said dad who was pail in the face holding mom as she wiped her tears

ron noded and walked up stairs he opened the door only to see ginny wraped in a blancket laying on her side her nees pulled up to her stomach she was in the corner and faceing the wall her face touching the wall ron stood there and backed away and went down stairs

"i cant she is in a ball in the corner "ron said bill got up and they both went up stairs looked inside only to find her in the same position bill came over and placed a hand on the blancket and unraped her she looked up and got to her feet bill nelt down in front of her and placed his hands on her sholder

"firefly are you ok "bill said ginny emmidiatly started to sweat bill got up and hugged her ginny stifened but slightly relaxed

they walked down to the table and ginny sat down

GINNY 'S P.O.V

i sat down and my mom smiled at me and placed food on my plate we started talking i stayed quiet but i knew they were looking at me

what if they thaoght i was crazy ?

did they think i was mental ?

did they care were they just going to send me away when i was to much to handle ?

i sat there im sweating i feel my heart beat fast i bite my lip and i taste blood i claw at my hand with my nails and i hear nothing i hear nothing everything is distant

"gin are you ok "said ron

i nod but i start to have the feeling panick attack i feel like im dying i try to stand up i push my chair back but then i feel myself go out i fall to the floor they all stand up i feel a hand around my waist and they help me up

"sorry im so sorry "i said

"ginny stop you did nothing wrong " charlie said

"im fine im fine "i said i was i got up but i looked around ron was looking concerned they rest were the same bill helped me up and he took me upstairs

we opened the door and bill helped me sit on the bed

"ginny look calm down ok your bleeding its fine just calm down look we are leaving today to romania ok just calm down "he said

i nod "could you use reparo on me i asked the nuse but she said i cant be fixed like that "i said i saw his face break and he hugged me close i held on to him

the train started to move i sat next to ron as he ate bill infront of me as the train moves by slowley i pick up my fork and i eat. reading books hepled me i read books with lots if words because i liked to feel like i was swimming in them i looked at the little doodles in the book i wanted ti write a book on anxiety

i had baught so many books on my problems and read stories of other people who had them i wanted to write one

it got dark really dark as the train moved by

"come on bed bed time lets go "mom said she smiled at me as i walked by i got into my pigama botoms and the jursey charlie gave me i layed down and bill got in next to me and kissed my head and he hit the pillow and fel asleep i snugled close to him and fell asleep

my nightmare went like this

i'm walking carying two little figures on my sholder one is named depretion the other is named anxiety we are walking and i dont want them i want to get rid of them because they make me want to hurt myself they are bad fir me

we stop at a river it has sharp rocks around it it looks deep and i know i could drown or get stabed by a rock i drop them in the river

i start to walk but they beg me to come back so i stop and turn and stand at the edge of the small clif i threw them off of

they neg me tell me they need me that i need them and they are trying to help me so i jump in i grab them and they use me to get out i ask for help but they satand there i start to sink

im sinking loosing air as they cheer and clap they got what they wanted as i sink and drown

 _i wake up_.

its about 7:30 am and i lay there bill is laying on his side his back to me and i lay there as tears well up in my eyes not because i was scared only because i did not under stand it

i start to panick i feel like im drowning but i stay quiet fearing i will wake bilm he wakes anyway to gind me shivering i was red in the face and tears streaming down my face and the moon shining through the train window ilumintated it

bill puled me close as i cried i stoped and calmed down i felt him fall asleep i layed awake for 2 hours thinking wanting so bad to understand it all


End file.
